Song Of The Week

My song of the week comes from my reality series of the week- Mob Wives. The intro song by Rock Mafia “The Big Bang” is hella catchy! Check it out.

RHOBH: Even Malibu Couldn’t Save Us

O-M-G…I don’t want to say it but this season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is getting more heated than the housewives in Jersey! I never thought this day would come…but then again I never expected Taylor to fall a part the way she has throughout this season. Seriously, every single episode she’s either crying…or she’s cussing someone out…or usually both. This episode was no different.

Brandi with the broken leg has been trying to ‘fit in’ with the housewives since Episode 1 of this season…and clearly her leg has been keeping her back. Whatever she does, it doesn’t work, she just makes things worse for herself. Like when she was invited to Dana’s game night…and she accused Kim of using ‘crystal meth’…umm okay. And this week, when she finally decides to throw a house party and give back to the women that gave her a name- instead of just being Eddie Cibrian’s ex-wife. She throws a house party…except she just moved so her house isn’t ready…so she uses her friend’s house in Malibu. She doesn’t cook…she definitely doesn’t clean…seriously who uses someone else’s house to throw a house party!! What kind of housewife are you!

Okay, so tensions are high right now because of what Camille said to Taylor a few weeks ago at Lisa’s house. Camille basically told Taylor to be honest with herself, and admit to herself all the bad things Russell has done to her. Obviously, Taylor got crazy mad at Camille for saying that- but it doesn’t make sense because Taylor was the one who told Camille all those things in the first place. And it wasn’t like Camille was going to the tabloids with that information…they were having a private conversation.

Last week was Adrienne’s fashion show…Taylor ignored Camille the entire time…and basically left everything to be resolved this week. The women arrive at the Malibu digs…and oh my was it a view! Wine and seafood…and an oceanview? Seriously ladies how could you mess that up! Brandi is just weird, I don’t trust her, I haven’t trusted her since day 1…first of all wear a bra. The ladies were having fun with her all night because she wasn’t wearing one…and you could see everything through her white dress. (Dumbass) Then, Brandi brings up Kyle’s sexy husband Mauricio…except Kyle was really quiet about their marriage. You could tell Brandi was jealous that Kyle’s been married for so long and has such a stable relationship with the hottest man. Kyle just keeps things to herself…and gets feisty when women like Brandi talk about her husband. (We know what you were thinking Brandi-Broken-Leg)

So towards the end of the night…and clearly after a few glasses of wine…Taylor starts crying because Didi (Camille’s friend) sparked up a conversation about Taylor forgiving Camille. Taylor steps out onto the beautiful backyard deck facing the ocean…and then Brody Jenner’s mom(yes she was present) goes on to say once they’re done fighting…and no longer there…the ocean will always remain the same. LOL! What? Where did you even come from…and are you on crystal meth? Taylor starts balling…and it’s obvious at this point she’s not even crying about Camille…there are bigger things Taylor’s depressed about. Camille is not even involved in the argument…it’s more Didi then anyone else. She is yelling at Taylor because Taylor won’t realize how good of a friend Camille is to her. (Didi you’re extra, so leave) Then…as if it’s even her house…Brandi realizes the attention is no longer on her…and kicks Taylor out!! She said Taylor was ruining the party…and causing drama…and she was no longer allowed to stay in her friends’ home. Taylor leaves…along with everyone else…you just committed social suicide Brandi…seriously just give up.

Kyle and Taylor end up leaving together, Taylor breaks down in the limo and demands a cigg. Kyle tries to make Taylor feel better, but it obviously doesn’t work because Taylor is one ****** up housewife! Girl needs some serious help!

Brandi breaks down inside her friend’s Malibu home…and admits all she ever wanted was to be accepted and fit in…her friend gives some amazing advice…and tells Brandi to just be herself.

Sorry friend who owns the Malibu home…we never got your name.

xo

RHOBH: Kennedy’s Party

As if Taylor didn’t realize from Kennedy’s birthday last year…that was taped for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and showed just how awkwardly fake, her and her husband Russell were trying to be for the sake of their daughters’ birthday party…she threw another one this year.

So this year she throws Kennedy whose turning 5…a country fair/carnival themed birthday party…with horses…pony rides…and those balloon playhouse things that I’ve really wanted to try out. How come we never had those at our birthday parties?…

Anyways, everyone shows up except for Lisa because she’s busy planning her daughter’s bachelorette party/wedding invitations. However, one good thing did come out of last week’s episode. Magically, Lisa and Taylor have worked through their conflicts and are now friends. Lisa agreed to support Taylor with whatever her decision might be in terms of her marriage…and Taylor was very forgiving. Except, Taylor turned her hatred onto Camille…who wasn’t invited to Kennedy’s 5th birthday party. (Shame)

Kyle was shocked at how fast this all got resolved.

So, the party ends up looking amazing…Kennedy has a wardrobe malfunction…I guess she was partying too hard on that playhouse…and she gets sung Happy Birthday by a drunk American Idol contestant. (Yay)

Everything seemed to be going perfectly…even awkward Russell seemed like he was having a swell time. But, when Russell wanted to take a family picture immediately…instead of after because he had a horse coming in for Kennedy- Dana accused him of just wanting attention. Dana said they should wait until 4pm…but Russell freaked out on her…and did it his way. Wow, I mean Dana had no say since Russell was paying for the birthday party after all…right???Hmmm…

Her present was obviously a horse…no one in their right mind would buy a 5-year old child a horse…except for Russell Armstrong. Dana agreed by pointing out they couldn’t even take care of a puppy…how are they going to look after a horse…much less pay for it! (She didn’t say that last part)

Anyways, it was just a weird ending to the episode…clearly Taylor and Russel couldn’t be more dysfunctional…but Taylor’s sticking it out because she thinks its better to be with someone than to be alone. We know how that story ends…

xo

 

RHOBH: Russell Is A Wifebeater…

Wow, I honestly don’t even know where to begin about this week’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I know almost 98% of these shows are staged, but the things that happened in this episode- were definitely real. From the beginning of this season, you could tell the housewives became closer with one another- discussing personal issues like their marriages. Last season I think Taylor and Camille seemed to me like the ‘typical’ Beverly Hills housewife…living in a sort of dream world where they ignored their problems.

However, this season it seems like those two have changed the most…especially Camille, and Taylor isn’t far behind. Both women have been damaged by their husbands…Camille made it known earlier on..and now we can see what’s really going on with Taylor. Obviously, we all know she filed for divorce a few months back…right before her husband’s suicide- so we know how that story ends. But, to see her going through all the emotions prior to his death…it’s really real.

Taylor gets honoured at some LA Women’s thing…and she doesn’t invite Lisa because she feels Lisa has always been rude to her, and doesn’t care about her. By accident Kyle calls Lisa and wonders where she is…that’s when Lisa tells Kyle she was never invited…but wanted to invite the girls for a Tea Party tomorrow. Taylor doesn’t seem apologetic about not inviting Lisa, she makes it clear that there’s definitely animosity towards Lisa…and it’s going to come out soon enough.

So, here’s where everyone lets it out. At Lisa’s house all the housewives arrive, and Lisa doesn’t waste anytime asking Taylor why she wasn’t invited to her Women’s event thing. Taylor tells her the truth, that she’s tried so hard to be Lisa’s friend but Lisa never gives a s**t about her…bla bla bla. Lisa denies it all…and tells Taylor she’s always been there for her…she admits at first she didn’t like her…but when she realized Taylor needed help…she wanted to support her. Lisa doesn’t seem like a bad person..she’s actually a really strong women that honestly wanted to help Taylor. Clearly, Taylor has been feeling strongly about Lisa for a while because the waterworks start pouring out…and she gets all crazy!

Taylor leaves the room…and while she’s gone the housewives talk about her well being..and her pointless marriage. Camille finally enters into the conversation…and tells everyone that Taylor was over at her house complaining about her marriage and Russell..and then 3 hours later was excited to get on a Jet with him. Camille said she was confused at this, she didn’t know who to believe because Russell had been nice to her…but Taylor was telling a different story. Like I said Camille has had the biggest change in these 2 seasons…she’s really laid back and you can tell she’s gotten much stronger.

When Taylor decides to come back…they bring up the fact that her marriage is falling a part. Taylor gets defensive and asks the ladies why they’re even talking about her marriage…when they should be talking about Lisa. She gets angry at the fact that everyone apparently talks about Lisa behind her back…but when it comes face-to-face nobody wants to confront Lisa. This is where Camille literally stands up…and tells Taylor out of everyone she’s not telling the truth. She’s clearly holding things back from the group…and from herself. Camille says all the times Taylor came to them crying about Russell…him hitting her…him breaking her jaw!..they never told anyone because they wanted to protect her. But now they were letting it known…I guess for Taylor’s safety.

You can tell the ladies just want to help her…at this point it’s not about the cameras…it’s really about these housewives seeing a really damaged and broken woman…that could potentially be them…and all they want to do is help.

Seriously, this season’s getting better so stay tuned!

RHOBH: Kyle’s Seance

This week we were a little late on catching up with our weekly housewives on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The season’s only getting better, so make sure you tune in!

This week, Dr.Paul (Adrienne’s plastic surgeon husband) organized a ‘Girl’s night’ event at his offices, for anyone of the housewives who wanted to get work done on their face- without involving actual surgery. The housewives obviously showed up…including Lisa who as always joins in on the fun…without getting herself dirty. I’m not sure if Lisa’s had anything done, and she sure didn’t get anything done this time because she said she was going for dinner right after.

Anyways, Kyle, Taylor, and Kim who showed up late all got something done…except Camille couldn’t make it because she was hit with a custody battle between her and her ex-husband Kelsey Grammar. It was a pretty uneventful time at Paul’s office…except for the yummy looking cupcakes and when Lisa got an e-mail from Russell telling her all is well between him and Taylor, that nobody needs to worry about their marriage. Lisa found this odd as she quickly found out none of the other housewives’ received an e-mail like it. As we know, last week Russell told Kyle and Mauricio that he thought Lisa went blabbing to US Weekly about his (not so secret) marriage issues. Obviously, we know the truth, and they were in a bad situation…only they didn’t know how bad their lives would get. Russell committed suicide only a few months after that episode was filmed.

Moving on, Kyle decides to throw a Seance at her new crib…if you don’t know what that is…it’s basically a gathering, where you have a medium that can communicate with ghosts/spirits. Before everyone arrives, Kyle decides to invite Brandi, who she hated only a few episodes back. You can tell her invite was completely involuntary…the producers probably told her to invite Brandi in hopes of stirring up some more drama. Anyways, Kyle’s husband Mauricio is truly amazing, he is so fine, and I do wish he was mine! Seriously, he’s the hottest husband ever…except Ken wins the award for hottest housewife husband over 60.

So the ladies sit around the table…while Adrienne’s chef Bernie is hard at work preparing dinner. The medium- Rebecca begins her ‘thing’ that she does…and she starts mentioning Adrienne’s father who passed away when she was a young girl, Lisa’s grandmother, and Kyle’s mother. It was a night filled with emotion, as the medium Rebecca definitely hit it home with her messages from the spirits. It was funny because they showed clips from Camille’s dinner night where she invited her friend who was a medium. Except she was a complete biatch…and when Lisa begged her to see if she could hear her grandmother- she said she was taking a night off from ‘mediuming’ or whatever its called. So rude.

In the end, Kyle heads over to Kim’s house because she’s moving out…again. Finally, Kim gets the courage to tell Kyle she’s been dating this guy for a year. Before the episode ends, Kim invites Kyle inside to meet him, except we never see it- so make sure you watch next week!!

 

RHOBH: Wackjobs All Over Town!

This week’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was actually really funny. It was Pandora’s engagement party/a dinner party at Taylor’s with Mauricio and Kyle.

Finally, we didn’t see one-legged Brandi…and all her nonsense drama. So, Taylor invites Kyle/Mauricio and their youngest daughter for dinner since Taylor’s daughter is the same age. At the dinner table Russell brings up the fact that there was an article in US Weekly saying Taylor and him were separated. Obviously, not true at the time..and Russell started accusing Lisa of being the one to spill the beans.

Kyle wasn’t buying it…she defended Lisa the entire time…obviously Russell was agitated at the entire thing because his relationship with his wife did suck…and we all know it was on the verge of ending!

Moving on to more interesting events…what I learned from Pandora’s engagement party:

1. The housewives are absolutely hilarious

2. There are wack jobs all over Beverly Hills

Some rich guy Mohamed whose also Pandora’s godfather throws a huge Moroccan themed party at his mega mega mansion. Once everyone arrives, the party moves downstairs where Mohamed has disguised his ballroom into a huge Moroccan tent. Yes, I said ballroom. He has a ballroom in his basement…crazy? The feel of the party seemed real genuine, everyone looked like they were having a good time, cracking jokes, and doing the splits. Kyle decides to perform some crazy gymnastic moves in front of everyone! She’s so funny.

Paul…Adrienne’s husband is actually hilarious…I love watching him…and this time he sets on a mission to find Mohamed’s hidden ‘sex’ room..behind some secret wall. This guy’s house is nuts. And that wasn’t the only thing nuts…the ladies meet Martin’s lady ‘friend’ whose clearly a wacko…not even in disguise…she’s just a wacko. Even Taylor and Camille were weirded out by her calling her husband ‘daddy’. And can I take the time to mention how weird Mohamed’s hired entertainers were! The funniest moment was when Camille steps out to the poolside…and sees the weird mermaid girl literally flopping on the cement…she was SO confused…it was the funneist thing ever.

Lisa is always hilarious…she’s so confident yet she finds the opportunities to poke fun at herself…especially because she’s the oldest housewife.

Overall, the party seemed to be pumpin’…and it looked like the housewives got along just fine. Mauricio looked sexay as always.

And then the shocker…in the end we see Kim whose on some secret date with her boyfriend of one year!! But, they look adorable together and it’s time for Kim to be happy!…we’ll see what happens next week.

xo

RHONJ: Reunion Part II

This week has been a little slow in the world of television…not a lot happened on DWTS except for Chaz getting booted off (that was inevitable). Then, out of left field CW failed to bring us a brand new episode of 90210 Tuesday night! Crazy, right?

And, I don’t know if you’ve been keeping up with Dirty Soap…but I recently caught up on some of the episodes..and it’s kind of lame. I feel like the fake drama is at an ultimate high…where even I can’t stand to watch it. And trust me, I have a pretty high tolerance for bad TV. Anyways, we can always count on our housewives to get us through a rough week…especially when it’s the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion Special Part II!!!

I have to say…I think Bravo could’ve fit the Reunion Special into one episode…but obviously they wanted more $$$ so they opted for the Part I/Part II deal. I felt like last week’s episode was dragged on…and a few things were talked about more than they should have- because they needed enough content for the 2-part special. I wasn’t as excited to watch Part II…I think Caroline ruined Teresa in the first half…there literally is nothing else to say to her.

So, apparently Dina doesn’t talk to her sister Caroline anymore. If you’ve seen the original season- you’ll know who Dina is…the blonde one with the weird nose. Anyways, she left the show…and I guess she had a falling out with her sister Caroline and her sister-in-law Jacqueline. Andy kept asking Caroline why they don’t talk anymore…and Caroline basically insinuated that Teresa is the reason they don’t talk anymore. Dina and Teresa talk…so she’s only mad at Caroline. Nobody knows why…but there definitely is some family drama that doesn’t involve the Giudices.

Teresa is so full of sh*t…even when Andy asks Kathy about her daughter’s past she has to take the stage. Kathy’s daughter Victoria had a brain tumour when she was 10…Teresa literally interrupts and says she was at the hospital everyday (nobody asked Teresa if she was at the hospital…nobody cares!!)

Seriously, Teresa has some crazy ass issues- everyone is against Teresa…and she still can’t admit that she’s legit insane. I love when Melissa stands up to her…and she’s actually telling Teresa how crazy she’s being and she needs to come back to reality.

You all just need to watch it for yourselves..it’s almost too ridiculous to talk about. Or just wait until Season 4!

xo

 

RHONJ: Reunion Part I

What is this like the frigin’  Godfather Trilogy? Why is there Part 1 and Part 2 of the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion!! This is so crazy…and Bravo is hilarious for banking on these crazy women. Correction: Crazy Teresa. And when Crazy Teresa is faced with split screens- she can’t get away with her lies.

I don’t know if it’s just my screen…but why does everyone look orange? I know Melissa and Teresa always have that fake orange glow…but I’m actually shocked to see my two fave’s Caroline and Kathy beaming like two guidettes from the Shore.

So, right from the get go you can literally see the tension between two sides…well three if you count Kathy’s. There is obviously a divide between Teresa and Caroline. And, an even bigger divide from where Kathy is sitting on the couch to where Teresa is seated. Andy makes it clear that Jacqueline is missing from the reunion and asks the ladies what is the reason for this. After a full 40-second pause…Caroline decides to answer the question. She says that they were taping last night for Season 4 (the night prior to the taping of the reunion)…and something happened between Jacqueline and Teresa. Jacqueline was so emotionally drained she couldn’t gather herself to get to the reunion and look Teresa in the face.

I just want to say that last season was all about that crazy b*tch who was a stripper…and she helped her boyfriend with some kidnapping? I don’t even want to say her name…but anyways this season the bad person is obviously Teresa. This time around, most of the focus is surrounding Teresa’s cookbook…where she poked fun at Caroline, and everyone else. I get Teresa said some rude things…but really I think she was joking. I don’t get why everyone was getting worked up about it- especially Caroline. I don’t think it was as big of a deal as Caroline made it out to be…for this I am confused. There must be for to the story that we know about. Clearly we’ll know it all in Season 4. I think Teresa had good intentions…especially towards Caroline because who wouldn’t be afraid of mama godfather. But Teresa’s crazy…I mean who knows what she was thinking when she was writing her cookbook!

There are definitely a lot of awkward silent moments…especially when they roll the clip of the baptism when Teresa’s brother got into a fight with Teresa’s husband. The camera’s came back and everyone was in shock…Teresa was crying.

Caroline kept shaking her head the entire time…Andy brought up an interesting point that Teresa and Joe Giudice pulled out of bankruptcy. Apparently because they were facing ‘bankruptcy fraud’. I never heard this but Melissa says its public knowledge…and Teresa kept denying it. Clearly, Teresa is crazy and her lies over the seasons aren’t adding up anymore. Caroline admitted at first she hated Melissa and Kathy because of waht Teresa had said about them. But, once she got to know them better she realized they were completely normal…and it was Teresa who was the crazy one.

After everything…I love that Teresa still says her husband didn’t do anything wrong.

Now that’s love.

RHOBH: Sl*t Pig!

The drama continued from game night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Kyle and Brandi continued their argument in the beginning of the episode…and Kim apparently had some input as well. Somehow in the midst of her anger towards Brandi called her a crystal meth addict…she called Brandi…a slut pig. Amazing! Where have you ever heard that term slut pig?…Kim is frigin’ hilarious…especially when she gets angry and feels like she has to protect Kyle.

Anyways, after a few minutes of arguing back and forth Dana and Taylor finally interrupt the ladies and put the fighting to an end. After Dana tries to send Brandi home quickly…they have trouble finding Brandi’s crutches. We find out that Kim actually hid them..finally Dana finds them and they send Brandi off.

Obviously everyone was on Kim/Kyle’s side because Brandi kept saying how Kim was doing crystal meth. Apparently, Dana really wants to fit into the Housewives group…and kept telling Kyle they needed to go on some ‘healthy vacation’. Dana seems really nice…but definitely too desperate to get attention.

Kyle and Kim pack a van with their kids and head to their family house in Palm Desert. Everyone keeps mentioning that Kim might have some personal issues/alcohol issues..who knows. It’s Beverly Hills! Who doesn’t have issues!!

Then Camille invites everyone to her charity lunch in honour of her mother who is suffering from bladder cancer. The ladies all show up…and as usual they’re seated at the same damn table. Lisa is caught in the middle of the drama because she was absent at the game night fiasco. She doesn’t know what to make of Brandi. One thing she does know is that her daughter is the complete opposite of your typical Beverly Hills bride. Probably because she was born and raised in England.

Planning Lisa’s daughters wedding seems like a stressful job for Lisa especially when they meet the extravagant wedding planner. He wants to go all out- spend millions of dollars…and obviously Pandora doesn’t want that.

Anyways, nothing else really happened except for the fact that Lisa is obsessed with Winston Churchill.

 

RHOBH: Coke Wh*re!

On last night’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills there was a lot of awkward moments going on between the old housewives…and the new addition Brandi. I really don’t know what goes through this women’s head…either the producers are telling her to act a certain way…or she’s just really messed up. So last week we noticed 2 new additions to the Housewives group- Brandi and Dana.

This week, Dana decides to throw an extravagant game night party at her house…because she’s a renowned event planner…and has planned events like the Grammy’s. So Dana goes on and on about what her amazing plans are about her party…and I’m thinking it’s going to be an amazingly outrageous party!

By the way Dana’s the one who bragged last week about her $25,000 sunglasses.

The first housewife to show up at Dana’s is Kyle…and then soon after Brandi. Brandi and Kyle don’t get along…they had an awkward moment at Adrienne’s pool party last week. While Dana leaves the two alone…they’re just sitting at opposite ends drinking their drink. And then Camille shows up…along with Taylor…and then lastly Kim. The room that Dana’s holding everyone captive at first, is some random room with 2 chairs…a table with desserts and a bartender. That’s it. Where was the extravagant decorations…the outrageous party decor?? Dana kept telling the ladies this was just the ‘waiting room’ before all the guests arrived and they would make their way to the ‘main room’. Eventually they did…and the ‘main room’ consisted of 2 old couches and a table with some game cards on it.

Clearly Dana’s crazy…or she’s just a fake because she didn’t decorate sh*t…and it just makes her look like a fool. Anyways, Kim kept going into the bathroom because she was adjusting her makeup. Brandi kept noticing this and assumed Kim was doing drugs…she goes on to say she was a ‘model’ in Europe in the 90s and knows all about people using drugs. Calm down like you had a real job…because you were probably one of those girls that was in the bathroom doing lines. Brandi needs to find another ‘social circle’.

Ironically, Dana teams up Kim/Kyle/Brandi which makes for an even more awkward game time. The housewives have to start acting out things…and then their team has to obviously guess. Kim and Kyle kept asking things that were only relevant to themselves…like questions only they would know the answer to. Brandi was getting annoyed by this…because apparently she really wanted to play a game on game night! She freaks out randomly…and says how would she ever know the answer to such questions…but really nobody listens to her.

Finally, Kyle says she wants to do an IQ test…and calls up Brandi. Brandi responds by saying, ‘Okay, bitch’ in a ghetto way- except it didn’t really sound like she was joking. Kyle obviously sensed the tension…and got all defensive. Brandi started talking about how they kept leaving her out of the game…and how Kim kept going the bathroom (insinuating she was doing drugs) Kim and Kyle freak out…obviously Brandi has no right to say that…Taylor and Dana are scared as to what’s about to happen. Camille’s just happy the drama isn’t surrounding her anymore. So they basically shoot Brandi down…she’s not going to win against the two sister’s especially because everyone loves Kim and Kyle and nobody knows Brandi.Brandi, I guess you didn’t learn anything from Mean Girls.

And Lisa’s daughter Pandora and her boyfriend Jason get engaged. Yay!