AHS HOTEL: ‘Room 33’ RECAP

I hate to admit this but I’ve been searching for points in the season that are going to disappoint me and eventually make me hate the season entirely. But the new season of American Horror Story: Hotel hasn’t done that just yet, and I’m starting to believe that I’m not going to be disappointed with this season. Like any other American Horror Story season, there’s a lot of stories floating around. The writers bring in a lot of characters, and then slowly disperse them or connect them to each other. We’re now in episode six of the Hotel season and things are starting to come full circle nicely. BTW, this recap will have spoilers. BTW, Will Drake has a nice butt.

willdrake-ahs

Lady Gaga: I think everyone had their uncertainties about Lady G filling the shoes of Jessica Lange, but she’s done an amazing job with her character this season. [Confirmed Gaga will return for the next season of AHS- whatever that may be] As the season progresses, I’m more enamored by her character and her motivations. I had a discussion with a friend a few weeks back and we were talking about Gaga being the villain of this season, and whether or not she’s supposed to be. Is she a villain? Should we assume she is mostly evil and a little nice? Or is she just a really complex character that has a good heart. Well, if you watched this week’s episode you probably know the answer to that. And it’s ironic that I was asking that question because I knew right from the start of this week’s episode, Tristan and Liz Taylor weren’t going to make it out alive.

As much as we’ve seen her give life to some characters, and in most cases she literally gave life to them or brought them back to life, she has a sense of ownership over them and she expects them to be loyal to her. She exudes this nurturing motherly figure, but really their happiness isn’t her concern, and her killing Tristan just shows that it’s all about her.

But an important flashback from this episode, 1924 Gaga shows up at the Murder House (season 1) to visit the doctor that everyone’s been raving about – the abortion doctor! Except Gaga isn’t having a baby, she’s having a demon baby. And when the doc pulls it out, it’s still alive and attacks the nurse. The better world would be slaughtered. But I guess since then Gaga has kept this demon baby  – Bartholomew hidden in Room 33, and for good reason that ish is fugly.

Demonbaby-ahs

Bartholomew: Super exciting that the entire time Gaga is kidnapping children around Southern California, she has a real baby of her own locked up in room 33. I mean it’s not a real baby, the face is pretty much torn off, and it has little beady eyes like a shark, but I mean it still came out of her V so it’s hers. We know about the baby because of the flashback, and then we see Gaga saying goodbye to it before she goes to Paris, and then Buffy the Vampire Slayer shows up at the hotel and wants to see little Bart. When Angela Bassett’s character enters room 33, she’s attacked by the demon baby. Also by this point we haven’t seen the demon baby yet. But anyways, John (Wes Bentley) is leaving the hotel after a bloody threesome, and before he zips up his suitcase demon baby hops into it! And then when John gets home demon baby escapes and lurks around the house. Scarlett is downstairs eating popcorn when dad sees the demon baby and shoots at it. Demon baby scurries off leaving a trail of blood. Scarlett gets sent back to her grandmothers, wow Chloe Sevigny is a ruthless mother she didn’t even want to look at her daughter now that she has Holden. Still outside, Chloe sees the demon baby and picks it up and brings it back to the hotel. When Lady Gaga returns she looks all worried and Chloe’s all like don’t worry I saved your baby just like you saved mine. And in the moonlit room Gaga doesn’t look so evil holding her demon baby.

Matt Bomer: Seems pretty useless right now, but he feels the need to preach to the two Swedish girls that died earlier in the season. “Find your purpose” he tells them, and I really hope he’s not quoting Justin Bieber. Ugh.

Liz Taylor: Is in love with Tristan and Tristan is in love with Liz Taylor! Who would’ve thought these two would fall for each other?

Tristan ‘When I come down to the lobby it’s like you’re genuinely happy to see me, I believe you’ Liz Taylor ‘You’re not gay for being with me, I’m a girl. Thank you for seeing the girl’

How cute are they though!? But you know sh**s about to go down because Tristan is Gaga’s boy toy and ain’t nobody going to steal her toys. Liz Taylor knows they’re screwed but he can’t help himself. PS, how much are you loving these 80s beats in the background? Gaga is too busy with Will Drake, until she’s not busy because uh…Will Drake is not a fan of the ladies. One quick text from the Countess ‘Cum up’ to Tristan and he knows he has to go.

iphone-ahshotel

A. I love that Tristan calls her the Countess in his phone book B. His battery is charged fully even late into the night and C. Her spelling.

Long story short, when Tristan and Liz Taylor tell Gaga, she says okay you can have each other. And then she kills Tristan!!! Not shocking but totally ruthless!

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