RHONJ: Caroline’s Fitty!!

This week on The Real Housewives of New Jersey the crew continue their vacation in Napa Valley. Caroline turns 50, they finally leave the RV park and drive to the Lancaster Estate which is this huge mansion on a beautiful vineyard. Chris and the BLK crew get closer to sealing the deal with the wine company, hopefully the two Joe’s can stay in check and not ruin the last few days of the trip

If you saw the preview’s for this week’s episode, you know that something crazy goes down between Teresa and her husband Joe. In the preview Joe takes a phone call while at dinner for Caroline’s birthday, when he sees Teresa walking over to him he whispers into the phone ‘Here’s my b**** wife coming over’. So after everyone visits the wine company, Albie,Chris and Lauren blindfold Caroline to take her somewhere special. They drive around the corner to where a table is set up for everybody, and it’s over looking the vineyard- it was the most beautiful place, it seemed like a really unique backdrop to celebrate a birthday- I mean who can say they dined overlooking a vineyard in California?

Halfway through dinner, Joe Giudice gets a phone call from ‘work’ so he gets up to answer it. He walks away from the table, and you can totally hear his conversation which seems to be with a girl. His voice is really low and he sounds really dirty talking to whoever is on the other line. Just then, Teresa comes over and that’s when he makes the comment about her- calling her a b**** and a c*** obviously Teresa doesn’t hear him saying those things! Doesn’t he know he has a mic on him? But he was talking really low, I think he thought he might be able to get away with his conversation. Nobody at the table really notices that they’ve both left, they’re busy taking pictures with Caroline. Teresa literally waits in front of Joe until he’s done with his phone call- he pretends to continue talking about some work stuff in Italian. She hangs over him like she knew who he was talking to, or she had a feeling he was being shady. I’m sure it’s not the first time she’s caught him doing something like this.

Anyways, in the end they walk off into the vineyard- Joe just wants to get back to the food, but all of a sudden Teresa wants to get it on in the vineyards! Out of nowhere she starts jumping on him, and he’s trying to pull her off, it’s just a really weird and awkward moment, obviously she had a feeling he wasn’t talking to his co-worker, and she’s just trying to make their marriage look legit on camera. Teresa might be a dumbass, but when it comes to putting on a happy face- she is the master of it all. Trying to make it look like her and Joe actually get it on, and that they’re love life is so hot and heavy that they got it on in the vineyard- it’s all BS. The best part was when Richie spots them getting it on from where he was sitting at the dinner table.

When Teresa and Joe return to the table some comments are made but nobody really talks about what they’ve just witnessed- they don’t want to give any attention to Teresa, which is exactly what she wanted. It’s just really sad, and I actually feel sorry for Teresa who is pulling at every string to save her marriage and keep her family together. Melissa has a conversation with her about the tabloid stories and explains that anything she talks about they will turn into negative comments, and it’s not worth the damage she causes to her family and friends. But Teresa doesn’t care what the tabloids write, because at the end of the day she needs to get paid.

While Kathy is doing Caroline’s hair, the ladies have a conversation with Jacqueline about Teresa. Kathy admits she kind of feels left out because Teresa is now focusing repairing her relationship with Melisa and Joe. Kathy expects this from Teresa, but it still hurts realizing Teresa just calls Kathy family whenever it suits her. Then, everyone meets for a fancy last night dinner. After Chris makes a beautiful toast, Teresa obviously has to step in and make a toast of her own. She thanks Chris and Jacqueline for inviting them to Napa, and thanks them for repairing the relationship with her and her brother, and then wishes Caroline a happy birthday. Meanwhile, Kathy is literally sitting beside her, and Teresa totally forgets to mention Richie and Kathy! Caroline is stunned and infuriated because they were just talking about that a few minutes before. People start whispering around the table, even Greg is angry with Teresa for not thanking Kathy. Kathy just puts on a happy face and goes along with it, seriously she is my favourite housewife, she is everything I want to be as a housewife, Richie on the other hand is angry at Teresa and hurts for his wife because he knows she will care for Teresa no matter what.

Tune in next week because Caroline and Joe have an argument out of nowhere, Jacqueline is drunk on the couch…and Caroline’s son Chris gets involved…it’s getting good!

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